Surrender

We are tempted to think that the more powerful we become, the better we will battle sin. But the exact opposite is true. The more power, influence, or prestige we possess, the more temptable we are. The strength of sin feeds on our sense of strength. This is why we are warned that “pride goes before destruction, and a haughty spirit before a fall” (Proverbs 16:18). In weakness, we feel our need for God, but when we are strong, we lack that saving sobriety. We lost the need of God and mostly in strength we tend to think THINGS ARE UNDER CONTROL..but it is not so. THEREFORE learning to surrender towards God is needed the most…then we will know how to respect a sovereign power over us. An authority to lead us and not to control us.
-wisdom

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Live Life far from Media

Live Life far from Media

Most people who do not feel good on the inside are more concerned with Facebook status than those who actually have a good life. Facebook or social media became an attention disorder for some.

In one or as soon as 5 minutes you become a celebrity.
However, it is good attention for entrepreneurs, vendors, institutions, sports and artists around the world. And that there is room to share their faith, thoughts and too much of their life.
Be careful when betting out your private life in the social. Imagine that there is reality outside the screen. Life is short, every hour is golden, so spend time with your families, friends, acquaintances and make no impression on people you do not like at all. Do not impress even those people that tries to intimidate you. Live the life as it is your rewards on earth while you breathe.

Keep in mind that we humans have no security for tomorrow.

Today or later or tomorrow we either wake up or die. What we do by the time is very important.

Slow down with social media, surfing, youtube and other things that are really useless for our soul and body

For the faithful, read more, pray for more, transform yourselves into an influencing tool with a good sense of will and power from above. Be the light of the world. Be more kinder, be more forgiving, appreciate more the trails of life. Be less in complaints and be more thankful. Do not impose too much of your own impression on others but live the faith accordingly to the instructions of the Torah. Be not fanatic, but be a believer. A belief that is Alive.

For most people, seek the truth about life, forgive, laugh and love people more than hate.

God is good who gives life to each and everyone.


De flesta som inte mår bra på insidan är mer oroade över Facebook-status än de som faktiskt har ett bra liv. Facebook eller sociala medier blev en uppmärksamhetssyndrom för vissa.

På en eller så fort som 5 minuter blir du kändis.
Det är dock bra uppmärksamhet för entreprenörer, försäljare, institutioner, sport och konstnärer runt om i världen. Och att det finns utrymme för att dela sin tro, tankar och för mycket av sitt liv.

Var försiktig när du delar ditt privatliv i det sociala. Tänk dig att det finns verklighet utanför skärmen.

Livet är kort, varje timme är guld, så spendera tid med dina familjer, vänner, bekanta och ge inget intryck på personer som du inte alls gillar. Imponera inte även de människor som försöker skrämma dig eller göra dig svartsjuk.

Lev livet, för det är dina belöningar på jorden medan du andas.

Tänk på att vi människor inte har säkerheten för imorgon.

Idag eller senare eller imorgon vaknar vi eller dör. Det vi gör vid tiden är väldigt viktigt.

Sakta ner med sociala medier, surfing, youtube och andra saker som är egentligen onyttig för vår själ och kropp.

För de troende, läs mer, be för mer, omvandla dig till ett påverkande verktyg med en god känsla av vilja och makt ovanifrån. Var världens ljus. Var mer förståelse, var mer förlåtande, uppskatta mer livets utmaningar. Var mindre i klagomål och var mer tacksam. Tryck inte för mycket av ditt eget intryck på andra, men leva din tro i enlighet med Torahs anvisningar. Var inte fanatisk, men var en troende. En tro som är Levande

För de flesta, sök sanning om livet, förlåta, skratta och älska människor mer än att hata.

Gud är gid som ger livet åt en och alla.

The day of Birth

The day of Birth

It is funny to be greeted by friends “Happy Birthday” remembering only the day I was born by the date and year and time. I myself consume my mind on remembering the day my mother had the hours of difficulty. The time where she had the labour just to bring me out of the womb.

Of course I am thankful and grateful of all the greetings.. I judt have to pay attention that the day I was born.. It was my mother who gave birth to me. =birth day.. 😂😂

It must be painful for her at that time to struggle thinking just to survive the birthing of a small little child. And that moment, she must have forgotten all the worries she carry out day by day.

I wish people would remember her more than I. I wish people would think of her again as every year passes by how she had survived those very first moments just to give me the chance to live and experience life.

I was a history of abortion. In the middle of my mother’s pregnancy she probably had stopped doing what she planned to do do against the life inside her womb. I was born with a left blind eye. I experienced the bullies and humiliating events from people who did not know the story of my appearance. I experienced a difficult childhood. From her hands, i know how to feel the pain and the violence of every mistakes that I have made. I shed the tears by hearing how unlucky she was because of me. Through my teenage years, I kept the pain as if they were a part of me. It wasnt easy. All the scars would speak of the memories that I kept in silence. Yet I am happy she was still mother.

Those years have made me realise how fragile she was because it was the only right thing she knew to raise me. It was the memories of her upbringing that she thought was right to transmit and apply as a guideline to discipline. At times I honestly shed my tears with anger. I had resentment and I blew all the blame on her. I misunderstood her and even myself. But now, I reached the stage of wisdom through the years.

I became 33. And I am so thankful for all the things that happened.

Today is the day when my mother took me out of the world.. then I see… Half….
Today was the day when God decided then how I would look like, how I would see the world, how my heart would beat and how my life would be formed through the journey..
Today was the day when God set the people before me, to meet, to keep, to love, to loose, to hold and to cherish..
Today is not about party, not about cake or fancy gifts. Its about saying

THANK YOU GOD I SURVIVED ANOTHER YEAR WITH THIS CRUCIAL LIFE..!! THANK YOU GOD YOU’VE MOLDED ME DAILY BY TEACHING ME THINGS IN LIFE. FOR KEEPING YOUR HANDS AT HOLD EVEN WHEN I’M OUT SIGHT, FOR KEEPING ME SAFE EVEN WHEN YOU KNOW I AM A HARD HEADED CHILD..

To the One Above.. Im grateful living this life… 😌

Being a Victim

Being a Victim

We mostly get tired of people whom are victims of abuse. And in our terms, our wish is that they would be set free. We do our best to take them out if it. Yet often we see then returning.

Of course we get distracted and disappointed because we dont understand what is happening in their minds. We think sometimes that our efforts were neglected and that our relationship with them somehow starts to be out of hand. Until the day, we want to give up forgetting that once we had the days when we also were victims.

We must understand it is a difficult situation for that person and it is a personal attachment. The only thing u can do is to allow the person see the wrong thing in the event. Although you have given your advice it is still very difficult for the person to be influenced by your thoughts because the person itself face the fear and has very low self esteem. You must remember that the abuser had stolen their identity and trampled their lives. In that manner the abuser was using its power to make use of the victims positive mind from the beginning. I believe that the abuser itself is a broken soul and it feeds to break another to feel a little better. To damp the brokenness inside. we must never forget to understand those who are in weak situations and we shall not look down on them i was once a victim and it took me so long before i got out if it. I was looked down by people who think that i get returning back to the abuser but the thing is, i wasn’t strong enough because the people that tried to pull me out of it are the ones who speaks about mistakes. Points out how i shall be and how i should think. It created confusion in me because I didnt know what to think for myself and the hopelessness grew… One day there was a person who found my strength by suggesting ne solutions and that friend never imposed aby ideas but stayed with me and told me. “You are strong enough” “do you think this things happening to you arecorrect?” “i will always listen to you sentiments until you get free from it because I am hoping you soon be free”
These were always her words whenever she got tired of my repetitive conversation. Until the day i stood for victory.

The idea of hurting others indeed comes from the inner source of the soul in hebrew called ‘jetser hara’ – long for evil. It is in the inner part of the soul connecting from the sinful nature of man. Yet the idea of doing good is the longing for good – jetser ha tov in hebrew.
These has been implanted in our soul therefore many of us either become aware of being abused or not aware of abusive behaviour.

Each of us.. No one can deny that even though we are born again has sometimes the attitude of abuse. Which in term of Paul, we can always discipline ourselves to not obey the jetser hara.

Please have kindness at heart and an understanding attitude towards the person you are facibg difficulties. We might not know what we say might lift then up or might bring them down. ❤️😘 I speak according to my experience.
Yeshua always look upon the broken hearted and has a contrite spirit. A broken soul is the one who needs guidance and has a restless mind. A contrite spirit has the sleepless thoughts and worries, an anxiety of the heart caused by other people who are abusing them and using them for their own benefits.

Yeshua had cared for these people and showed meekness and kindness to them. He was not exempted even to the humiliating events that we also experience in life. That is why He said,

I am the bread of life. Whoever comes to me will never go hungry, and whoever believes in me will never be thirsty
John 6:35

Take it as an example.
Until then if the person want to stay where they are.. Then thats their matter.. We cant do nothing.. But to respect the decision.

Piece of Thought

Piece of Thought

Last year was full of disappointments, sorrows, tears, striving, wondering, expectation, pain, evil gaze, and wrong accusations.

In addition, it was full of new steps, new decisions and not letting the emotions take me. I realized in my difficult times that there are no genuine people. Even those who believe they are 100% righteous. Some people are quick to judge in advance before they know what has happened in one’s life. Adversity that not everyone was told during some time of struggles.

Certainly you can have friends, but when the time comes when the friendship is proven then you know that some can hang you up in the air. I am against religions and organizations hiding behind facades and living in others’ livelihoods. Such fanatics who want you to do only according to their own conclusions and own decisions. Those who talk a lot but were not present in weaknesses. I have learned that one should not tell too much about their private matters to others who pretend to be believers. Because it can be used as a weapon against one.
Have learned a lot that it is testing your faith when challenges arise. It tests your qualities and relationships with fellow human beings but on the other hand you are grounded to become another better person. Nice to avoid fake people and people who have seen me as a sinner, prostitute and those who say I am in need of attention. You divert people from the truth. Hypocrisy is great.
This year is ONE BIG BLESS for me and my family .. For this year I have the BEST TIME of FREEDOM. And this year was the PEACEFUL YEAR GOD HAD LED ME TO. AND God gets all the glory. May you be blessed. Thank you.


Förra året var full av besvikelser, sorg, tårar, strävan, förundran, förväntningar, smärta, onda blick och fel anklagelser. Dessutom det var fylld av nya steg, nya beslut och att inte låta känslorna inta mig. Jag insåg i mina svåra tider att det finns inga äkta människor. Även de som tro sig vara hundraprocent rättfärdiga. Vissa människor är snabba att döma i förväg innan de får veta vad som hänt i ens liv. Motgångar som inte alla fick höra under svpra tider. Visst man kan ha vänner men när tiden är inne då prövas vänskapen då vet man att vissa kan hänga upp dig i luften. Jag är emot religioner och organisationer som gömmer sig bakom fasader och lever i andras levebröd. Sådana fanatiker som vill att man ska bara göra enligt deras egna slutsatser och egna beslut. Sådana som pratar mycket men fanns inte i svagheter. Jag har lärt mig att man ska inte berätta för mycket om sina privata ärenden till andra som låtsas vara troende folk. För det kan användas som ett vapen emot en.
Har lärt en hel del att det prövar din tro när utmaningar uppstår. Det prövar dina egenskaper och förhållanden gentemot medmänniskor men däremot du blir slipad för att bli ännu en bättre människa. Skönt att slippa falska människor och folk som sett mig som en syndare, prostituerade och de som talar att jag är i behov av uppmärksamhet. Ni avleder människor ifrån sanningen. Hyckleri är stort.
Den här året är ETT STORT VÄLSIGNELSER för mig och min familj.. För den här året har jag FRIDENS BÄSTA TID. Och den här året var det fridfulla året GUD LEDT MIG till.OCH Gud får all ära. Må ni vara välsignad. Tack för mig.

Envy, you’ve been chasing Humanity!

Envy, you’ve been chasing Humanity!

I have also learned why people work so hard to succeed: it is because they envy the things their neighbors have. But it is useless. It is like chasing the wind. – King Solomon

People would envy others in their prosperity and so much that some would even parade themselves better than anyone. In their lives they work hard, they strive hard not because they love what they do. They work hard, strive hard because they want to impress people they don’t like. Show off to people they hated and brag to people that looked down on them..they suffer to become something but nit enjoying its result. Because from the beginning, the motivation they say to themselves was : “I WILL SHOW THEM WHAT I WILL BECOME, And I will prove myself to them” and after all is done, all comes to nothing, all becomes ashes after one. All the things they envied and worked hard to get meant nothing after all, because the heart was not in it and only the motivation of impression was there. And all the things became meaningless because there was no satisfaction and enjoyment in what they have achieved.

In all the achievement they get, the more sorrowful and depressed they become. For they have not seen the meaning of life and the joy in doing things with a merry heart. Their successive days were spent in agony of chasing after others attention

They chase success not for their heirs, but for their enemies whom which do not care. And their heirs would receive their part without care for it was not built for them.

Spare yourselves from this attitude and get rid of your own pride.

I would like to give you a simple piece of word. To first forgive those who harmed you and ask forgiveness to those you’ve harmed. Then seek a good thing that you want to do and put all your heart in it. Do it for your sake and for your beloved ones. You dont need to impress yourself to others and you dont need to show off that you are getting better. You dont need to be confirmed that you are doing the best. But do all your best to satisfy yourself and create a good integrity among your family and surrounding. You can do things with all your hope and belief without others watching you. But let all be done with a merry heart in the sight of God. Get rid of envy, for it is like a cancer to mind. The more succeed you become, the more gentle and giving you shall be. The more known and infuencial you are, the more open and down to earth you shall be. Dont assume you know it all. For remember, all will be ashes in time amd your hardwork will meant nothing. Dont spend your life in envy and bitterness.

Be Godly and decent. .
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#life #live #love #pinay #ofw #dreams #faith
#אהבה #נישואים #חי
#מודהאני #חיים #מודה_אני_לפניך_מלך_חי_וקיים_שהחזרת_בי_נשמתי_בחמלה_רבה_אמונתך #ישראל #ברוך #פיליפינים 2018 #תלמידים
#thankyou_god #dailypractice #pinayofw #sverige #soul_for_god #discipleship #philippines🇵🇭 #life #counsels

WHO is ABLE?!

WHO is ABLE?!

Who can wear your shoes and understand it?
Who can listen to your story and tell it?
Who can wear your shoes and dare to judge you?
Who can able to hear you cry and dare to wipe your tears
Who can understand you and patiently lead you in life?
Who can teach you a lesson without killing you inside?
Who can speak with you without intimidation
Who can allow you to grow without setting a hindrance?
Who can stand for your integrity without partiality
Who can give you strength in weakness
Who can love you without hidden mask
Who can show you wonderful things without a pay
Who would help you without blowing a trumpet

O yes, when we look at mankind, our own image and alike!
No one would dare to take a stand
And yet promises are spoken to become a helping hand
The sudden times expose that there’s no one
And at your failures you face the test
So many measures at your mistakes
And at your weakness you have no friends
One by one they see you as a pest
Maybe God had punished her in the end
All the empty words fly like withered leaves
Yet the wind carries the whispers through the chills
And the lips will never stop hurting
As the eyes will never stop judging
Still in the image of divinity there’s a propaganda
You will know WHO you shall turn yourself into.

And Who is like God? Who is like Hashem?
The One Who loves with pure intentions
The One who sees your purpose
The One whom you can depend on
The One who wont desert you
The One who understands
The One who forgives
The One who knows your limitations
The One who nurtures your growth
The One who restores you
The One who leads you into The right way
The One who teaches you in your misconceptions
The One who heals you in brokenness
The One who fills you in Hopelessness
The One who assures you have a friend
The One who opens the gates in your return
The One who gives peace under the storm
The One who feeds in hunger
The One who pours water in thirst
The One who shows wonders and signs
The One who helps with a mighty hand
The One who redeem a lost heart
The One who sends a saviour to never get lost
The One who will always be the FOREVER LIVING GOD

Writer: Karla Rochelle Darang Rosenberg
Emal: oselrimon@gmail.com

You Stare Like You Knew

You stare at me with your pretty eyes
In your mind full of disguise
My life is not that interesting
So please.., stop fishing
All I was, A little girl
Yes..Like I always were

My heart does beat
As gentle as the breeze
My dreams are higher than the hills
Way better as it seems
I might not be special in your eyes
But I can share whats in my heart.

My appearance is not what eyes see

But Its the heart that I carry
Yet I wont blame you look at me
Coz thats the way it should be
You draw my image in your eyes
As i get deeper with my sighs
Dont worry friend, Im alright
SOmeday I’ll be your light…
***Rochelle***

Some Memories In my Mind

Some Memories In my Mind

Sharing my testimony to all of you.

2 Timothy 2:1-3 (NKJV)
Be Strong in Grace
2 You therefore, my son, be strong in the grace that is in Christ Jesus. 2 And the things that you have heard from me among many witnesses, commit these to faithful men who will be able to teach others also. 3 You therefore must endure hardship as a good soldier of Jesus Christ.

Glory be to God…
Love and embrace from our Lord Jesus
And the leading of the Holy Spirit be upon us all…

Romans 8:37-39 – No, in all these things we are more than conquerors through him who loved us. For I am sure that neither death nor life, nor angels nor rulers, nor things present nor things to come, nor powers, nor height nor depth, nor anything else in all creation, will be able to separate us from the love of God in Christ Jesus our Lord.

See how time pass by.
Many many Years ago I was in deep pain, depression, stress, deep childhood trauma, molested and sexually abused, resentment, anxiety and nearly suicidal. All this were in one package …
Grew up in a family with a Christian mother, and father was a Catholic. I am born with blind eye on the left. Until I met The real God in 2010..
Then everything started to shaken more in life.

God saw my soul was wounded deeply and oppressed by the devil. So years later I was rescued by the hands of the Almighty God. How precious we are in His sight, I could say.. That His love abounds in deepest waters, we can’t comprehend it.
Things have been storming my life since childhood years, but all was a just a puzzle game that I fitted into a better understanding now.
I’ve been with the boat of Jesus without understanding that life as a real Christians would mean of endurance and patience, but until years later when God opened up the doors to show me my rewards despite of disobedience..God saw my possibilities which I and others couldn’t see with me.
Although my life is not that honey and flowers all the way, God blessed me and equipped me, provided me my needs somehow.
I’ve learned to be faithful and loving to God that I became more focus in worshipping him. I’ve learned to be more knowledgeable about God rather than being religious..
God taught me that relationship with Him requires my obedience and willingness to speak with Him and trusting Him in all odds.

1 Peter 5:6-7 – Humble yourselves, therefore, under the mighty hand of God so that at the proper time he may exalt you, casting all your anxieties on him, because he cares for you.

Psalm 86:15 – But you, O Lord, are a God merciful and gracious, slow to anger and abounding in steadfast love and faithfulness.

God gave me Two children..
Though my past relationship was a painful failure, and though the pain had caused a big damage, God touched my wounded areas of life and healed me deep within. He lifted up my life, healed my parents, blessed my siblings, healed a broken relationship between my mother and me. God gave me the possibility to speak more with kindness and love to my Parents. God taught me that obeying His commandments was never a burden, but it became naturally part of me.
So, even though I failed along the journey, God didn’t focus on my mistakes, because He was focus on my future that I wouldn’t get harmed and that I would be prepared for the biggest changes He had set before me.
My chase after happy marriage stopped..

And I surrendered to God everything and so..
God gave me new man. A man that needed also the grace of God.. A man that loves the Lord Jesus and would open up his life for me and my family. A man I’ve found an with an open arms family.

Cars, house, money, new gadgets, clothing’s- these are not my wants and dreams!!
But sharing the Gospel, being a medical aid, and a woman of faith, healing the sick, praying for the needy, helping those who are in need is – THAT’S MY HEARTS DESIRES…

God of Israel! How Great You are!
Now, looking back.. all I can do is praise the Lord Jesus, and give glory to the Father in heaven.
Thank God the Holy Spirit is within me..
Thank you Jesus for the Cross..!
I love being a Christian..

You can change if you want to!

You can change if you want to!

In the presence of dismay and disappointment, there is no room for logic. Every good things is not in mind and the innocence of hope is replaced by fear, anger and frustration. But where do I begin?

Have you ever been into situations where you were lost? I have. Except from sexual abuse, I had a difficult childhood which caused traumatic stress disorder. Maybe i felt more confused than lost in some situations. Yet lost in feelings and emotions. As a grown up I was labelled liar, prostitute, garbage, stupid, fool, ugly, not intelligent. And in my adulthood, I was called adulterous, attention seeking, power hunger and many more. I find it hard to have so much stamps over yourself and however you want yourself to change, to others it won’t matter. Bullies and degrading treatment are not over by childhood years, the worst bullies are adults. But I take this a challenging times. And I encourage others who goes the same thing to be strong and never give up.

How shall I divert the thoughts of disappointment and the feelings of dismay into the position of positivity? I asked for help in times of insanity and frustration as I turned myself towards those I looked up to..the “church people” and yet time and again the answer was ” we will pray for you”. There was no offer of getting me out of the clouds that wrapped me up in a rollercoaster ride. In the end, that’s when I realised, it’s the psychologists job to do. Which in fact a church elder shall have as a position to help a person depressed. Or suicidal.

And I turned towards people that I trusted, I waited for a hand to raise me up yet the answer I received was stunning. I became the traitor and a liar.

I realised that all of us are quick on judgements upon others situation. Sometimes even if it is dear to us, we usually push them away whenever we see them do wrong, sometimes we don’t have a good manner on how to guide a lost person into the right path. We mostly make a quick decision when we hear things about others, forgetting that once we were in that position and we were in need of help. Now when we had the power to guide others, we mostly think it’s right to instruct the rules and apply it upon them rather than show them how they shall do and take their hand and take them out of the ditch. Generally, people usually push another person deeper into the ditch rather than take them out. We forget to weigh judgements. And we work as prosecutors over others. Isn’t it irony, we hear it preached on the pulpit, spoken on the lectures, and written on literatures that we shall have patience and understanding towards others, that we shall be open in our hearings to execute right judgements, and yet we mostly do the reverse. And depression is such a horrible place to be caused by different situations that has never been cleared out in a person’s life. Either physical abuse, emotional or verbal.

Being alone in the fight, I had to struggle by myself. And to divert the connections about a certain person to a certain event to certain emotion, I have to learn to give up the contact and accept the fact that the event already occurred and cannot be replayed again. I had to learn the process in daily life by forgiving and releasing myself from the connection with the people that hurt me and. I had to learn to forgive myself about certain events that connect to the painful memories that causes a strong emotional distress and a repetition of flashbacks that delays my healing process. I had to renew my mind by giving up on seeing myself as a victim because nothing happens for a reason and it does not happen because I deserved it, rather things happens because we all are humans who fails to do the right thing and we mostly fulfil the lusts of our bodies in different forms like embarrassing others, killing, gossip, abuse and others.

I learned this year’s that it does not matter what others says about me. Because I live the life I walk and I do my best to make things right. I don’t need to reaffirm myself whenever others remind me of my past, because I know that their purpose of reminding is to make me return to that certain event that would make me feel anxious which will cause me undefensive and frustrated. I am certain that people that surrounds us who knew us from the past can never be ignored but I also know that although they had been your friends, you shall never give them a key to hurt you or use your emotions to beat you.

The past had been done, and if by some reasons you have done wrong and committed mistakes, who else did not? And if by some situations you had committed huge failures, who else did not? This is the tragic of life and I or we have to accept that the past belongs there and that we don’t need to reaffirm ourselves from certain people, events or emotions that was attached to it. Learn to forgive and Let go. Forgiving does not mean forgetting, to forgive is to set yourself free from the certain events and people that causes your emotions to be distorted. It is giving you a passage to make change because of the event and making you strong enough to face a better future. Claim your joy by renewing your mind through new thoughts everyday. It might be hard in the beginning but once you train yourself to imagine your good future, you will be able to control your body and emotions to affirm about what’s ahead of you. And you will see that the past indeed will stay behind and it will never have power over you anymore.

Believe without seeing and have hope in believing.

Always be thankful before sleeping and even when you wake up. Look forward not backwards.

Love YOUR NEIGHBOR AS YOURSELF!

Love YOUR NEIGHBOR AS YOURSELF!

How shall we love others as ourselves?

What does BODY OF CHRIST MEANS AMD WHAT IS THE DEFINITION OF FAMILY?

When one of them sins, he harms himself as well as harming the portion of himself that resides in the other, since he is connected to his part that is contained within his fellow. They are related to each other.

Thus it is appropriate for a person to seek the benefit of one’s fellow, showing him generosity of spirit. He should consider his dignity as dear to him as his own, for they are literally a single entity. Because of this we are commanded, “and you will love your fellow as yourself.”

It is fitting that a person supports the fundamental goodness of another and not speak evil of him at all.  One should not wish for anything that is inconsistent with what God desires for that person, neither his disgrace nor his suffering, for they are related to God.  A person should not wish to see another’s downfall, nor suffering, nor any harm at all, and view the situation of as if he himself were immersed in the same suffering, or exalting in the same good fortune.

Deluded Dreams

Deluded Dreams

I have often thought that all dreams are suitable for each individual that desires it. And often as we go along the journey, we dream higher and more hopeful of the future. Yet we fall into mistakes we didnt intend to do. And all we think generally is….. we’re doomed. So we go around everyday worrying about the mistakes carrying the thought, ” God is angry at me”, “I can’t do this”, “I am not capable of this” and then through time, it became our identity….eventually.

Isnt it too obvious that we became so busy in the beginning focusing on the dreams that we have? Either small or big. When the days pass by and the waves of life takes us wherever it leads, we often stay in daydreaming. Dreams of not having the trials and everything shall be peaceful. It is very obvious that our dreams stayed in oput minds 24 hours a day. And the dreams sometimes makes us isolated and feel uncomfortable of the outside world and that the outside situations makes us annoyed. Because the dreams we have scares us often and we know for sure that it is not normal for others to hear that dream we have. So we keep the dreams inside of us and We shoved away the situations and we try to run from it, we try to avoid the emotions because we dont want to confront the feelings we will feel and then we usually look upon the sky waiting for a rescue. Like a powerful hero who would come down to bring us back to our illusions.

Reality, sometimes we hallucinate that reality are the things we see and feel. We tend to go along the trend of emotions and our bodies live in the presence of our thoughts. But in the presence of honesty, we see the real life that our emotions are in our way hundering us to become a decent person. And almost 70 percent of our thoughts are not suitable even for us to entertain yet they already had the power that made us all feel doomed.

I remember many times when I look at how I am now. And the moment I enjoy the thought of having it good then it reminds me of all the failires that I had been through. I was constantly reminded just in a minute of all the things that I committed with my own conscience, and in that sudden thoughts. I felt disgraceful. Although I knew for several years and times I had already repented with my whole heart still there is a sense of not believing what I have committed for myself. And from time to time I have fallen into mistakes, the feeling of knowing to be forgiven had slowly faded away and it was replaced with anxiousness and layers of guilt that I couldnt make things right. Suddenly, I felt isolated in thoughts and even right where I stood. Why? Yeah, because deep inside of me I know God had forgiven me but still I am stuck in the old days of my life that I am still living in my illusions that God is angry at me and that every mistakes I have done drives me farther from Him.

Illusions, we think that it is an illusion to dream of the things unseen. We drastically think it’s not a good thing to dream and that we often fall into the general trend that we should be logic. That we only have to live by what we see and that dreams are illusions and they shall not be hope for. Isn’t it we are good in standing against our way and we are so good in hindering ourselves from the possible future that has been aimed for us?

Deluded dreams – All of the negative shaping and voices and forms from the outside of our senses are tricks so we could not recognise our possibilities towards the future. The deceiving power of the outside are the ones that can destroy us if we are not observant to where we put our time and efficiency. These deceiving dreams and voices are in different forms – jealousy, anger, bitterness, hatred, criticism characters, rage and selfish ambitions ( Galatians 5 – read ) this are the traits of the outside and we unintentionally are trained through our upbringing and by our environment. Yet, hold it! We can be better than that!!

We are shaped by deluded dreams that we can only reach our BIG DREAMS through the images that we see and feel. I on the other hand, want to leave that space and I want to get my right foot towards the challenges of the unknown and reach the DREAM and make it to reality. If we learn to train our thoughts to use the negative impacts and experiences to become our tools and book of learning, we will be able to become succesful human beings. We can learn to first reverse all the negative traits and turn it into a thankful heart.

I want to encourage you, to believe the UNSEEN

Believe the impossible dream…. by shaping YOUR THOUGHTS. YOU ARE ONE STEP TO THE FUTURE…. By shaping your MIND. YOU ARE LIVING THE FUTURE

So take a step out of this deluded dreams…re arrange yourself and re allign and reconnect To the MYSTERY OF THE ALMIGHTY GOD

Happens for a Reason

Happens for a Reason

I am upset at myself, I’m angry at the world, and I’m not on speaking terms with G‑d for a while.

Then they line up, the friends who want to cheer me up, the spiritual leaders who know better: You know what my friend… No need to be upset… No need to be depressed… Everything happens for A reason!!!

The first thought that crosses my mind is, Where is your compassion? Where is your sympathy? Do you think I need to hear that I’m suffering for a reason? I’m Suffering! Is that suppose to happen for a reason?

The second thought that jumps up my brain is: Oh, yeah. Obviously everything happens for a reason. The reason I got into multiple sexual abuse from relatives and it made me become afraid to trust people. The reason I became a rape victim that made me having issues with relationships, that caused me to feel distressed and afraid of society. The reason it ruins my daily life. The reason I got into a violent marriage that brought me depressive episodes and anxieties. The reason I got divorce twice and caused me to feel miserable. And still I would hear.. Everything happens for a reason. How does friends and spiritual leaders console me by their words.

They say, things happen for a reason. And that things that happens we deserve. I refute this words because they are too extreme for me to believe.

I believe that God has plans and purpose for everyone and I understand His thoughts in the beginning of creation. That every creature both great and small, from the ones that walks to the smallest that creep has its very assigned purpose to complete each other fulfilling its task to become a lively event in daily occasion. And that every living creature has its fulfilling purpose upon the earth.

Whoever has faith in individual Divine Providence knows that “Man’s steps are established by G‑d,” that this particular soul must purify and improve something specific in a particular place. For centuries, or even since the world’s creation, that which needs purification or improvement waits for this soul to come and purify or improve it. The soul too, has been waiting – ever since it came into being – for its time to descend, so that it can discharge the tasks of purification and improvement assigned to it. Hayom Yom 3 Elul

Now we are talking business. Everything happens for thereason, not just A reason. And the reason is G‑d’s master plan for his universe

When I look back upon the things I went through in life, it is easy to see the negative things and think that I deserved the hurt and pain. And according to others opinion, it is happening for a reason. But when I looked at what I became after that, I realised that it was needed for me to go through so I may learn. And under the process I had the choice to either do not care or to just be afraid or either defend myself. I refute that it is not the purpose of my life, neither God had planned my life course to be in that manner. I believe that this things happened had came across without a warning because there is a desire in every individual, it can be for good or for evil.

Unfortunately, some of the unhappy things that happened to me was the result of my fear to fight and defend myself. Which I believe was not happening for a reason.

There is a case that makes me think just that sentence. When I faced a violent tragedy many years ago, I was devastated and confused about my lifes purpose. I heard someone said to me, “everything happened for a reason” and it strucked me. Because they did not knew I was a rape victim. And they did not knew I was abused as a child, and they did not knew that I was also abused as a wife. And telling me everything happened for a reason makes me think, that reason must be absurd and out of mind concept..

Everything does not happened for a reason. Things has purpose but it was not purpose for evil but for good.

We have the power to experience people, places and things in a G‑dly way, thus changing their composition from merely physical to a new spiritual dimension. The only reason weird things happen to us, is because we are challenged to elevate that situation from the annoying (to humans) to the pleasurable (to G‑d).

In other words “Everything happens for a reason” are not words of consolation, but a call to action..

Time – You’ve been so fast for me

Time – You’ve been so fast for me

I randomly looked at my old photographs, from places to nations I have visited. Watching the memories together with the people involved in those times. And I realised, time goes so fast and it had been too fast for me. And indeed as the word says, There is time for everything.

To every thing there is a season, and a time to every purpose under the heaven: A time to be born, and a time to die; a time to plant, and a time to pluck up that which is planted; Ecclesiastes 3

Watching the memories of old, it reminds me so much of all the questions that I have asked. The days where my innocence was greater than me. Questions Of all the why’s and what if’s that I have laid before my eyes. Watching above the sky waiting for reply, and then years passed by. I was left with all the questions unanswered and the years had spoken to me freely. I lived life like everyone eles. Without noticing the clear answers to my questions, I was too busy to face life. I was too focused on the things that I supposed to avoid…. negativity and fear to fail.

Those photos had reminded me how fragile I was in all the things I never knew and how prideful I had become from the achievements I gained through the years. With thoughts that I knew so much, which honestly had made me speechless this day. Thinking, how foolish of me to think like that? And I had created so much worries and felt like threathened when my very personal views where under attack. But now I have realised that my competitors are not human, for they as I am, fades away in time and seasons. And I found out that I compete with the time.

For it was not long ago when I was 8 years old and full of wishes and dreams. Where the flowers had crowned me in the meadows and the sky would rejoice in me. And the years gone by I turned 15 and the questions arised and grew more powerfully with many branches of what if’s. One by one, they were answered by trials and suffering, by good memories and happiness. Day by day, people were brought into my life. And the hours spoke a lot about the chasing of the moments. I have met Those people who have left good traces and even left tears and hurtful memories. And all was time tabled, a setting of which the maker knew I could handle. To which it tested my innermost strength and endurance. And the more I thought I’d fail, the more I became stronger. The more I thought I will be broken, the more I became whole. And time was always in the right hour and day. COunting every minute of my words and watching over my decision, My maker gave the strength sufficient to face the day.

Time, you have been so fast for me. It seemed only yesterday when I was born. When my heart was empty not knowing love and compassion. When my emotions were still under supervision of my parents. When my conscience were still innocent from pain, suffering, dismay and destruction. When my eyes only knew the beautiful things. And time went by, My maker had set me to battle. Towards the unknown, in which only Him knew the hour, the day, and the minute the journey would begin.

Now I have been learning to stand with you. Time, I can say that now I’ve learned to treasure you. And I am more aware of every words I’d speak. I am concerned of every speech my mouth release towards other people who would hear. I am afraid I would speak non-sense but you O Time, had learned me to be patient. To watch for the time and suffer under pressure with patient and disciplined Spirit. I became more compassionate because you Time, had been my voice that repeats and reminds me what I have done so I wont do the same mistake again. And my Maker had been your Lord all this life-time.Although I have made the same mistake, the time stood still so I could remember and learn to observe. You have developed me into a witty woman, you have showed me how to appreciate life in all situations. My Maker indeed have taught me Love without boundaries and Compassion with a merciful heart and righteous judgement. I have learned from you Time, that I should cherish life while I am still here. Despite of the tears that run dry my eyes, you made sure that my Maker would catch every drop in His hands. Reminding me, God holds me in His hands and that Time is precious.

Time, I guess I will have to learn much more from you… Give me more space so I could be a blessing every time of my life. And I know that my Maker holds time and space and is gracious towards all of us. I’ll learn to wait…for the RIGHT TIME!

Sunset – i Will see you by the morrow!

Sunset – i Will see you by the morrow!

What has been will be again, what has been done will be done again; there is nothing new under the sun. Ecclesiastes 1:9

 

I have been recalling the days I was a teen. Usually around five pm I look above the sky and I remember watching the sun go down. I usually imagined all the romantic movies I watched with two couples sitting together and holding hands sitting on the bench under a tree. It looks very inviting for me. And I wished that I would also want to have the same sunset when I would grow up.

Years had passed, and I am getting more older. I have missed many sunsets but there are times where I noticed it and the memory keeps reminding me of my wishes. The sun had been watching all peoples lives, witnessing all the things both good and bad, wealth and poverty being experienced daily. How the sun rises in the monring and then sets for the world to meet darkness. I lived life like the Sun had never been there and the moon had been a decoration. I have passed the days and nights of sorrowful times. I ahve overcome the trials and still I bear the wounds that needs to heal in time.

Few years ago, I have learned to appreciate the sunset. To stop and watch it go down. Its like I am standing there waving goodbye because I do not know if I will meet the morrow again. It is then I have learned to realise that Life is so short and the Sun is a very helpful to fulfill our task while it is daylight.

Today, I have met people who have the same mindset as I am. Listening to the words spoken to me today, I cherish everything that had been spoken. In this time of hour as I experience the tough moment of my life, and as the world seem to be a mixture of movement for me. I see the contrast of whispering hope been given.

I believe One day, I will have the chance to have a stable life and I will be more hopeful and glad. As for now, I just have to watch the sunset and wave at it goodbye for a night.

The morrow awaits…

And the JOURNEY WILL BEGIN!!