Your fear of God begins in Knowing Him

Your fear of God begins in Knowing Him

Therefore Education and Success has just a place in mankind to be used in service of others and not for own benefits. For in the day of our death, sucess will just be an echoe in the lying bed. In the silence of our bodies, we will not hear the success stories we have done, for God will reveal the true test of our victory.

It is a freedom to know the wisdom of God. And it is unbearable to know it. For by the time you start knowing the wisdom of heaven, you are obliged to perform its duty and to bear the mind of the upright. In wisdom, you shall be fit in mind and even the face of others. For you will always have a watchful eye on you. And these million eyes will never dare to see your good deeds but only sees when you stumble.

Educate yourself therefore with the ways of the Lord. And bring forth your soul to the humility of your heart. Seek the wisdom of God and you will know the fear of the Lord.

Proverbs 1:7 The fear of the LORD is the beginning of knowledge, but fools despise wisdom and instruction.

Proverbs 2:6 For the LORD gives wisdom; from his mouth come knowledge and understanding.

Psalm 19:2 Day after day they pour forth speech; night after night they reveal knowledge.

When big realities is seen in this world and in this generation? After all, theres the wars, murders, thefts, the poor and the poorer in soul, and the ills, and the jealousy and hatred and the groans, and the cries and the dead, are constantly reduced?
And if a man tells me, are you then enlightened and hated by wisdom? Blessed be God for showing me this wisdom. For opening my eyes from slumber of folly and stupidity..
From my childhood to the present, I have loved exploration and observation, for the sake of finding the truth, and for understanding the hidden, and for recognizing the lie and the mistake, and from seeking the truth will never cease my heart. but I have never liked nor enlightened education for my benefit, and to much good and succeed.
And there is no reason, and no advice, that it will be able to save man from any trouble and distress, and give him existing success. Education on earth is fine for the purposes of survival of mankind. And if the claimant continues to argue. And not in the holy language call, success in the name of education, it is clear that success depends on education and intelligence to which I will reply. There is education, and there is education. But as education exist, then man is the more dangerous as he can be. For who would know in the end where the man would lay his learning? Will he serve others or will he benefit himself alone? And there is education, of this world and there is education from the heavens given through the Messenger of God.

May the Lord be merciful to us all.
To the young and old alike.

Credit to Sefaria in the chapter of Sefer Yesodei HaTorah

Torah Education Online

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Contentment

Contentment

Right now! Are you satisfied with your life? As of now, are you content with what you have and what you are? Within satisfaction matter, do you envy others and still hungry for what they have?

Contentment in life is a big deal of maturity…

I know how to be abased, and I know how to abound. Everywhere and in all things I have learned both to be full and to be hungry, both to abound and to suffer need. I can do all things through Christ who strengthens me. (Philippians 4:12-13)

I have experienced poverty. I grew up in a family where my parents livelihood were just enough for a days meal.
There were days in my childhood years where I wish towards days of abundance. And it gave me comfort to think that one day, it will be better.
Then there were also days where we have overflowing food and our needs were met.

Then time came, I grew up. Got a job. Friends from different sources and lifestyle have surrounded me.
I was overwhelmed by it. Until I saw many sides of being wealthy.
Even if people are wealthy and lack nothing, surrounded by materialistic world and pleasure. I noticed the sadness in their lives, being able to defend their properties and fear of thieves and shopping was their comfort. The loneliness had become their enemy and discomfort in themselves had become their illness.
Self centered became their primary focus, “I” and “Me” is their ways of thinking and they are filled with lies of living filling themselves with thoughts that somehow it would make them happy. Then they were filled with pride and perversity, speaking of curses towards the poor and the lowly.

I stopped in a minute, and thought. Not so Lord God. I would rather live life that I have now rather than having that sadness in life. Poverty gives possibility of being content in any situation of life. Having self control in attitude and knowing the existence of life through God.
It’s good to have wealth, but it also means of giving and sharing your blessings to those who are need. I saw by my eyes that wealth can be a way of open doors and can even be a way to destruction.
It’s better that my life is easier. My needs are met by God’s riches and wealth. Basic needs are food, shelter and clothing. I have these. And I have my kids and a husband that loves the Lord. I have my family that cares and friends that loves at all times. And most I have the Lord Jesus that loves me and think of me all the time so I didn’t need to worry about anything because I know that by time, God gives according to our capabilities and responsibilities. I am more content both to earthly life and my inner peace is in God’s grace and love.
That my Spiritual life is more important than ever before.
Because I understand that life is very much more important than anything else in these world. Life is precious, every second and minute of it.
I love the Lord God rather than living like a queen. For being a Child of God is a better position rather than titles and career on earth that can’t be taken in heaven.
My soul will then bless the Lord as long as I live. So now you choose which way you place your heart. As it is written:

Matthew 6:19-21Complete Jewish Bible
19 “Do not store up for yourselves wealth here on earth, where moths and rust destroy, and burglars break in and steal. 20 Instead, store up for yourselves wealth in heaven, where neither moth nor rust destroys, and burglars do not break in or steal. 21 For where your wealth is, there your heart will be also.

Our thoughts are not His thoughts

Our thoughts are not His thoughts

For I know the thoughts that I think toward you, says the LORD, thoughts of peace and not of evil, to give you a future and a hope. (Jeremiah 29:11)

We may experience many things that we thought were not relevant to some situations we have. And many times we don’t like the moment or situations we are in but God has a plan that we don’t know. He has His ways to teach us through people that we may learn and gain more experience to be encouraged and to be prepared to the future that awaits us. For who knows what would happen the next day or to the future? Things may change but the fact is that our experiences are one of the things that can bring us to the success and happiness and Contentment in life. We may not understand yet the will of God at the moment but when you reached the top, then you will always look back..and smile. God loves you and God knows what He does with you. And he precisely know what you can and what is ahead of you. Just be patient and be calm.

Modest or Overly Dressed?

Modest or Overly Dressed?

Maybe they just thought I was behind the times or thoroughly overdressed? Or that sometimes they thought i looked so old in the dress, or some comments that I dont know how to buy modern ones to get along with the fashion… But who cares..?

In this times, we often are good at dressing to stand out the crowd. What in should be in our wardrobes, and we tend to make fun of people who dont get “in”.

Or sometimes, we mostly try to find our identification in the clothes that we wear. Which mostly can be misunderstood by people or trigger people to comment. And this gratification makes us somewhat to feel important. Can’t we not just dress modestly without the comments of others? Cant we just dress decency without provocative body language?

You can be very well dressed and yet your manners don’t have any connections to your fashion. Or you can be less-dress i suppose, yet your integrity is well respected.

As I went through and read other beneficial articles about torah women.. I stumbled in this article on chabad. And I would like to share it with you.

I have found a message by Ilene Rosenblum at Chabad.

Adam and Eve were initially able to perceive that the soul is the essence of a person, and the body is but a tool. There was no shame, and therefore no need for clothing. Since their sin, mankind has become easily misled by judging people by what they see on the outside. And that’s where my dilemma comes in.

Individuals though we may claim to be, in all places on earth where people have enough resources to actually choose what they want to wear, few people make that decision truly independently. In high school, dress code identifies whether you’re a “skater,” “goth,” or “preppy.” Later on, clothing makes a statement about profession or the economic class a person is in (or wishes they could be in). Perhaps because it’s all so new, the stakes here seem higher.

Dressing up is a respect to ones self. To give one a covering for protection in keeping something you dont want to show to everyone else.. And no matter what you wear, don’t be swallowed by the lifestyle. Wear a respectable clothing.. You are not obliged to stand out the crowd…
Just be godly and wear holiness in you. Remember that Yeshua came and were not royally dressed but brough down the spiritual clothing to redeem us all. Let’s all come to conclusions.. Let dress up decently and dont mind other people’s ways of dressing… One day.. They’ll also learn along the journey…

Be Patient.. Justice can be Served..

Be Patient.. Justice can be Served..

On your way to the lawyer, court proceedings or maybe just to report injustice you’ve experienced or witness.. You might be afraid, you might be anxious. But the Lord said, do not be silent in injustice and show yourself courageous to fight for what is right. Wait.. Wait for Him… It will come in perfect time.. But be prepared.. And settle yourself..

I would give an advice to people who have been into a violent situations before. Or maybe you are under the control of that violence right now. I know that cowards has been abusing you for your weakness but do not see yourself as lower than what the oppressor is implicating on you. Those words you’ve heard all these years, those beatings you’ve experienced. All of the people that left you alone to fight.. Those had left you scars, don’t worry now… You have survived them all! See! You are still here! You are meant to make it. Because you are strong… Believe me.. God made you stronger than what you can imagine…

I speak from experience.. I was a victim of rape, molestation and violent related issues within relationship. But most of all, I guess the part that I felt more victimised was the emotions, my self-esteem, integrity, my trust towards others and my behaviour towards the outside world. All these years, I spent myself being afraid, i soent myself coping with the thought that I can never get help and I can never move on.

The best thing to start with is..

  • Pray. All things.
  • To accept the things as they are.
  • To acknowledge that they already happened
  • Never argue with yourself anymore
  • Believe that you will overcome this situation you are facing right now.
  • Remove the people that puts you down. No matter how much it hurts, if they dont help you up but discourage you, it will become your worst scenario.
  • It may take time they say, But it is easier to FORGIVE. Without any questions of why and how.. Do not expect. Imagine.. will you wait for years and within those years, are you going to bear all the hurt and will you be under the power of hate until your health and psychological well-being will be at stake? Are you going to wait before you forgive? Let it go. Set yourself free. Its best for you.
  • Stand for what is right. Search for possible things that would help you find justice.
  • Be patient. Be kind. Be honest. And be brave. Have faith and be hopeful.

The table is empty and chairs are in place. The complaints are restrained and the defender has not yet arrived.

In the thoughts of the oppressed many questions are asked. Many things has to be laid upon the empty table and tears may fell unwarned. But emotions must be put aside and put herself back together to speak right.

On this empty table, the tension will become apparent. But as you pack yourself into the truth, you will have peace while you wait for absolute help. Justice has mercy, it may take a while. The waiting can be so long when you didn’t t had the strength to move on.

Imagine the years that took you before you came here today. It was good you never took justice in your hands but with a restless heart you still had hope that all will be in its place. God had placed authorities to pursue your rights. The states and its branches are under God’s law. They will not be blind for unrighteousness because you are seeking for what is right.

Never think in a second to give up. If you are experiencing difficulties right niw ubder a process.. Keep on. Keep fighting and set your mind on the heavenly things. It might take time to heal but the main process is to go against the nature of injustice. Your injury will get healed in its time and you will be able to stand again. In God’s grace you will be given the strength to start again.. Afresh.

Be patient…. Justice will be served!

Words to Give to Believers

Words to Give to Believers


God is beautiful! God delivers us from different kinds of pain, trials, and wilderness! Life is up and down. In it, God demonstrate His love as He teaches patience, kindness, understanding and honesty and truth. Life is not dramatic if you would learn from every step and be observant in every aspect of God’s perspective. He would learn you to keep down your selfishness and act in reliance to the Holy Spirit and mold you into the likeness of Jesus Christ.
Enjoy the little things in life, for one day you’ll look back and realize they were big things.
Nevertheless, be thankful for ups and downs, for when you look back, you will be thankful those days are over and have taught you well. For God does not make mistakes. He straightens the path of those who love His commands. Enjoy life! And don’t be exaggerated to take away your joy. It is our reward under the sun.
Be responsible for your freedom. Do not forget who you were when you were not in Jesus Christ, let it be shown to men and in the sight of God that you are blameless, approvable in all your manners and ways. That you may gain the crown of life. Do not live like the world.
But never forget, now that you are God’s children, and now Jesus is your master. In every steps, always give God the glory and Honor. Let your ways be blameless and be clean in your integrity. For in God’s time, you will face judgement in the sight of God being responsible of your own deeds. Be not like the world. – Karla Rochelle –

“And it is a good thing to receive wealth from God and the good health to enjoy it. To enjoy your work and accept your lot in life–this is indeed a gift from God.”

Be content with what you have
Enjoy what you have rather than desiring what you don’t have. Just dreaming about nice things is meaningless–like chasing the wind.
Keep your life free from love of money, and be content with what you have, for he has said, “I will never leave you nor forsake you.”
Now there is great gain in godliness with contentment, for we brought nothing into the world, and we cannot take anything out of the world. But if we have food and clothing, with these we will be content.

Be different from the world.
Do not be conformed to this world, but be transformed by the renewal of your mind, that by testing you may discern what is the will of God, what is good and acceptable and perfect.

Love not the world, neither the things that are in the world. If any man love the world, the love of the Father is not in him.
For “Whoever desires to love life and see good days, let him keep his tongue from evil and his lips from speaking deceit;
You who are young, be happy while you are young, and let your heart give you joy in the days of your youth. Follow the ways of your heart and whatever your eyes see, but know that for all these things God will bring you into judgment.
So I concluded there is nothing better than to be happy and enjoy ourselves as long as we can. And people should eat and drink and enjoy the fruits of their labor, for these are gifts from God.
So I decided there is nothing better than to enjoy food and drink and to find satisfaction in work. Then I realized that these pleasures are from the hand of God. For who can eat or enjoy anything apart from him?
Enjoy life with your wife, whom you love, all the days of this meaningless life that God has given you under the sun–all your meaningless days. For this is your lot in life and in your toilsome labor under the sun.

I Grew Each Passing Day

I Grew Each Passing Day

I grew more with my walk with the Lord every day and i experienced that i learned little better in time

Serving God in daily basis is indeed a marriage of the spiritual life

I indeed realise as along the way when we learned a lot… We becoming wise and as a part of heavenly wisdom.. We dont tend to be offended on things that mlstly many are annoyed at. I looked at it usually now and make sure I do what is good. As proverbs 16.24 says a righteous person falls 7 times. Then gets up again. But the wicked falls when calamity comes.
They easily give up

As for now i still work with my emotions towards certain things. And i try to manage my heart more than anything else because it is there where the Instructions of God shall reside. In my soul I do not want to hate a brother. But my heart shall decide for its actions and thats the only part I can discipline…

I try my best to work it out especially recently when i had a bad situation in my past marriage. I heard I had demons and as my problems couldn’t resolve, they have baked more demons instead of helping me out. I had no parental guidance in sweden and the only help i expected was with the company within the faith. Yet they hurt me. Yet I did my very best to not take it to heart. And i did my best not to be a madman. I cried and was deeply embarrassed. Yes i got discouraged, i got disappointed. But only for a while. I think that i want to spend my time believing that things will turn out good despite of trials. Im proud I kept my mouth speaking evil things and slipping nonsense. I did not complain. I did not provoke any. I did not backbite. I kept in heart hid my tears and God is patient with me.

In understanding I grew. Im proud spiritually that I didnt made my eyes sin. I kept My lips and my mind from sin in the middle of disappointments and trials.

It is indeed true, that keeps those whose eyes are on Him. And it is indeed important to keep your trust in Him in the midst of difficulties. For one day, the Lord will bring peace. And in peace within yourself, God brings solutions to situations you are facing. Be Still and Know He is your God.

What?? Once Saved Always Saved?

What?? Once Saved Always Saved?

One of the core teachings of Christianity is that we need to have faith in order to be saved. But what kind of faith saves us?

What is it that we have to be saved from?
Sins? Eternal damnation? Destruction?

In this study we’re going to discuss how we know we’re saved.

To do this, we’re going to look at three examples of people in the Bible who mistakenly thought they were saved, ( see Romans 5:9 ) see why they were wrong, and from that learn how we can know we’re saved.

Mistake #1 – Believing you’re saved because of your tradition

“Jesus said to them, ‘If God were your Father, you would love me, for I came from God and I am here. Why do you not understand what I say? It is because you cannot bear to hear my word. You are of your father the devil, and your will is to do your father’s desires.’” – John 8:42-44
Our first example comes from a heated exchange between Jesus and the scribes and Pharisees — the religious leaders of their day. Jesus tells them that He speaks the words of His Father, while they speak the words of their father, the devil.

These religious people felt they were saved because of their bloodline and because of the traditions they followed. They felt these things made God their Father. Many people believe this today. They feel because they were raised in a Christian home, or because they attend a church, they’re saved.

But Jesus refutes this by saying, “If God were your Father, you would love me…” The requirement for being a child of God is a personal relationship with Jesus Christ.

Notice two things:

1) Notice that Jesus says “you”. Not your parents, or friends or your church but “you”. No one can have a relationship on our behalf. You alone must put your trust in Him to be saved.

2) Notice that Jesus says “me”. It’s not where you were born, or what church you attend that makes you a child of God. It’s a belief and a trust that Christ came from the Father to pay for your sins (John 3:16). John 1:12 tells us that “all who received him, who believed in his name, he gave the right to become children of God.”

Let’s look at our second example.

Mistake #2 – Believing you’re saved because of your behavior

Two men went up into the temple to pray, one a Pharisee and the other a tax collector. The Pharisee, standing by himself, prayed thus: ‘God, I thank you that I am not like other men, extortioners, unjust, adulterers, or even like this tax collector. I fast twice a week; I give tithes of all that I get.’

But the tax collector, standing far off, would not even lift up his eyes to heaven, but beat his breast, saying, ‘God, be merciful to me, a sinner!’ I tell you, this man went down to his house justified, rather than the other. For everyone who exalts himself will be humbled, but the one who humbles himself will be exalted.”- Luke 18:10-14
Our next example comes from a parable Jesus told. Here we find that the Pharisee thinks he’s saved because of his good behavior. This is probably the reason most people today believe they’re saved. Most people feel that they’ve lived good lives.

But Jesus refutes this by telling us that it’s not the Pharisee who is justified (declare innocent from sin), but the tax collector. To be justified Jesus tells us we must be humble about our condition. We must realize we’ve sinned and call on God to forgive us.

Notice two things:

1) Notice that the Pharisee compared his behavior to the tax collector.

2) Notice that the tax collector compared his behavior to God.

The tax collector did the right thing because Romans 3:23 tells us that “all have sinned and fall short of the glory of God.” It’s “the glory of God” that we fall short of. Our behavior is compared to God — not other people — and all of us fall short when held to this standard. But Romans 3:24 tells us that we can be saved because we’re “justified by his grace as a gift, through the redemption that is in Christ Jesus.”

Let’s look at one final example.

Mistake #3 – Believing you’re saved because of your works or deeds

“Not everyone who says to me, ‘Lord, Lord,’ will enter the kingdom of heaven, but the one who does the will of my Father who is in heaven. On that day many will say to me, ‘Lord, Lord, did we not prophesy in your name, and cast out demons in your name, and do many mighty works in your name?’ And then will I declare to them, ‘I never knew you; depart from me, you workers of lawlessness.’” – Matthew 7:21-23
In our final example we find Jesus talking about who will be able to enter the kingdom of heaven. Here we find people who believe they’re saved because of good works they do. Again this is something many people do today.

Jesus refutes this by saying that He won’t accept their works. As we mentioned in our last example, God’s glory is the standard we’re held to, and it’s perfect. So unless our offering is perfect, it falls short of His glory. When we try to offer good deeds to atone for our sins, God rejects that because the sacrifice is stained with sin, and falls short of His glory.

Jesus says that only those who do the will of His Father will enter the kingdom. What is His will? “He commands all people everywhere to repent.” (Acts 17:30) What does it mean to repent? It means to turn from sin, to Christ.

Where our works are stained with sin and rejected, Christ’s sacrifice on the cross is perfect and is accepted. When we repent and come to Christ to be our Savior it means we’re relying on His sacrifice to make peace with God on our behalf. When we do this God credits Christ’s perfection to us and we are justified.

How are we saved?

In this study we’ve looked at people who mistakenly thought they were saved because of their tradition, behavior or good works. Each example had one thing in common: Each tried to obtain salvation through their own strength and fell short.

God gives us salvation through His Son. Our salvation isn’t based on what we’ve done, it’s based on what Christ has done. We know we’re saved when we know we trust in Christ completely for our salvation.

Verses to remember

— 36 “Therefore let all the house of Israel know assuredly that God has made this Jesus, whom you crucified, both Lord and Christ.”

37 Now when they heard this, they were cut to the heart, and said to Peter and the rest of the apostles, “Men and brethren, what shall we do?”

38 Then Peter said to them, “Repent, and let every one of you be baptized in the name of Jesus Christ for the remission of sins; and you shall receive the gift of the Holy Spirit. 39 For the promise is to you and to your children, and to all who are afar off, as many as the Lord our God will call.” -Acts 2:36-38

– “By grace you have been saved through faith. And this is not your own doing; it is the gift of God, not a result of works, so that no one may boast.” (Eph 2:8)

– “This is the testimony, that God gave us eternal life, and this life is in his Son. Whoever has the Son has life; whoever does not have the Son of God does not have life. I write these things to you who believe in the name of the Son of God that you may know that you have eternal life.” (1 John 5:11-13)

– He is able to save completely those who come to God through him, because he always lives to intercede for them. (Heb 7:25)

Experience God

Experience God

Sometimes, we base things by feelings, we base moments and events according to how good we feel and we are merely attached to it in those days when we don’t feel nothing at all.

But how do we truly experience God? Is it just by the good times? is it by miracles alone? is it by the overnatural things that we have seen and heard? Or is it by the events that were attached to us with emotions?

What if, all these years we have been seeking to experience God through supernatural events that we once felt and the most thing we think is that, God had left us because we do noit experience Him anymore? Because basically, we do not feel anything..at all..

The truth is, our emotions are very tricky. Sometimes, we are so overwhelmed on things that happens to us especially when it is extraordinary. I can tell that according to experience. I usually think God was far away because I had nothing to base a new experience with Him. Truth was, I am experiencing Him daily in my every day life. In small decisions, He is there. In every path I choose, He is there. In every people I meet, He is there. His presence is everywhere I go. There are big signs of His presence everywhere that sometimes we take for granted. The sudden blessings that comes, the unexpected meeting with people, the unexpected talk and the exchange of conversations that we had with people on the road. How did we perform? How did we show ourselves as representatives of the Master we belong to?

I learned by experience, God is in all of those things I do. Wether I am at my own home or at work or in the way.

The way we view life optimistically despite of trials is also the way we experience God. Because we know that we are learning new things.. To become better every day. You will look back in 5 years from now. You will see alot of challenges you thought you never would have been able to succeed. One day you will stand there in awe of God remembering that those were the times you truly experienced God.

The thoughts of Then and Now

The thoughts of Then and Now

LIFE HAD BEEN UPS AND DOWNS, Oh my! Im still standing!! Boy! The kids had grown! Time had made a blast, Children grow fast!! I’m feeling so emotional!

When I looked back how hard it was! Pushing up and making all things come to its place, Trying to make ends meet and God was always been gracious. God had been so generous. How many of those years I spent in crying, Those times I spent trying, and the times I felt dying!

Did you know? to make my ends meet, my children received used clothes from friends because I could not afford. I received gifts of clothes from friends because I do not have enough to buy one.I received help from a best friend in the US just to make it through. I used to pick up double jobs just to find extra amount for myself despite that I was married. I wont deny, it had been an abusive relationship! I got remarried 2nd time and it didnt worked. But I never complained, instead! I bent my knees in prayer in ALL THOSE YEARS till now.. And thank God I am free…
In between the lines, I have been judged by many leprous tounges, and I fought the battle. I was beaten and I can see clearly now although the peak of my purpose has not yet been fufilled… I can see, how strong I have been!!!
despite of the hardships…Im proud of what we have become!!!
Hashem is to be Praised

Keep Going

Keep Going

In every path of the way, you will always have the adventure of meeting different people in your life. And in every places and time, there are moments that you will never forget.

Never allow any events that cause deep hurt to turn your views in life to be suspicious on others. Most of these events were difficult, yes it might be different as to what others had experienced but it is not intended for you to become a negative person it is intended to make you grow and mature.

It is not easy to understand things sometimes but through the years, there are new things we learn and those are the highlights of our times. The good and the bad… The bad are the uprising event that shows we are able to face a new challenge to learn new things, that we await a good thing to cone in the morrow.The good is the results of the events that proves we strived enough to reach the goals.

The bad things that happened, some of them we didn’t wish to come and we didnt want strife to happen at all. We live in a world where nutrition for growth needs to be cultivated by experiences, some unexpected events and occasions that would either form us to become stronger or weak,either to rise or to fall. It depends on our reactions if we are observant on our emotional sides.

We havr to learn to manage emotional issues because sometimes they will cause us to be partial in every decision making. Sometimes right decisions does not happen out of emotions. It happens out of sound mind.

Look forward.

Whatever happens, if you meet struggles, keep moving. Stand up again. Do it again. It might be tiring, but you will discover the power of your strength if you have hope within your heart.

Abortion? The spirit of evil..

Abortion? The spirit of evil..

I am a survivor proof that even though it was a long time plan to abort me so God let me live …I do not know how many times my mother jumped and took medications just to get rid of me.

Then in the 8th month, she took even stronger medicine but it couldn’t. When I was born, the maternal nurse discovered that I am blind on the left eye, which may cause me to become blind when I grow up about 30 … I came out into the world with an inflamed, swollen eye and my mother hated me. I heard time and again how unhappy she was to see me. Wish I was dead. But my mind is strong. Learn to read early, draw strange things. Mature too early. Life became hard, but I learned to love her after all .. Because I know that anger cannot take me back to the event but I love life as it is. I met bullying in school because of the appearance, was called for all possible words because of the abortion. Failed child.

Today I live and am not blind. I see a little bit on the left eye through a miracle .. Thank you God.

I feel sorry for those who are hard hit and those who are unborn as the lawsuit has been taken away from them. My mother in any case after many years had asked for apology for those she did and that without complete info she had to learn about abortion and what consequences the child or woman gets until later. I have not been angry with her about it but without the result that was, I was very disappointed with her before. Thank Elohim our God and Yeshua our Messiah who gave me a new heart to see the light .. But even until today, the abortion event has an impact on me.

With that in the background, I in the Philippines have helped women who had thoughts about abortion. With God’s help, the unborn came into the world unscathed. Not everyone but you can help some 😊 There is hope for the women who believe they have power over the body and the power to take the gift of life from the womb. Giving them an insight into what and how the child became was their responsibility whatever it was for life situations they were in. The hope is that there are people who can support them and listen .. There are enough people on earth who will take care of their children if they did not want to keep the baby themselves. I have no claim to be angry with those who chose turn to keep their pregnancy but are very angry at those who are really deaf to hear and have the ill will to kill another person. On the other hand, I also hate people who are aides to murder .. God hates a murderer .. And with the women who carried out abortion and help to murder, God’s word describes it as an immoral act. Time and again even according to the history of the bible and the facts, devilish people have always existed. It is written in the scripture that people who do wrong to their mankind and take their lives are murderers and going against the commandments of God, so to speak. The law also describes the same.. The human rights not to murder. However, if there is someone who had already done so and accidentally read my post, I do not want to give someone a bad feeling. There is hope to turn around and resist the other murderers.
God hears all these unborn voices and every one who agrees to it will gain their profit from both good and evil. In all form God gives every man his punishment according to his deeds.

In Sweden, it is completely open with this and in other parts of the world.

In my home country, on the other hand, it is done in hidden , but if you are discovered, you get a prison sentence just like a murderer.

However, God must have mercy on the nations and the leaders of the countries who are co-workers of the murder of children. May God bribg justice in miracle way..

These children will cry and scream justice before the throne of God. The time of the lawless has come .. These children cry .. He hears it.

Sorry no Sorry

Sorry no Sorry

Most of us want others to forgive and move on. But we most forget what we said that broke their heart.

When God forgives us, He wants us to be reminded of what we spoke and take back the harsh words we have said. God promises then that we shall CONFESS TO ONE ANOTHER (A CONVERSATION BETWEEN PEOPLE WHO HAVE SOME TROUBLED STORY OR SOME CIRCUMSTANCES THAT CAME UP WHICH CAUSED DIVISION AND HURT ) and God promised that after we have asked forgiveness from people we hurt, or atleast we forgive other who hurt us, then we can pray to Him.. And God then FORGIVES US. and also He will remove all our sin and will not remember it anymore..

But to mere humans..we keep avoiding to ask forgiveness because we think God takes care of it. Without knowing that the person we hurt unconsciously are struggling emotionally, physically, and maybe spiritually falling.. Isnt it we are easy stumbling block for them? And isn’t it we bear the responsibility of their hurt..?

He would if we dont have any opportunity to find the person but as we can find the people and are just reach of hand, we can have a talk with them..
It takes a courage to ask forgiveness, it takes pride to be torn down before we acknowledge our own fault.
We are actually cruel!

In my experience, I grew up in a surrounding where I was thought to say sorry. In the fellowship I grew up with, i have learned to ask forgiveness. It took courage before I learned to do that at home. Still to this day, i have never heard sorry from the people that violated me, raped me, judged me and spoken things behind me.. On my part, I am proud to say that I asked forgiveness because I know myself that It is sinful to have resentment in my heart. And I know for a fact that it sets me free from having debts to anyone even if I think I am right. It did not matter if I think I was right. What matters most was, I was courageous to ask forgiveness and say sorry and I meant it.
This is what gave me peace… No doubt. Thats the Spirit of God.

No wonder why Psychological problems arise. Because there are many things we take for granted.
Some people waits for the time until the person who hurt them say SORRY! It even takes 10years,20 years or 50years before they would hear Sorry, before they themselves would dare to say Sorry!
Isnt it we humans, want God to be forgiving.. But we were born of adversity.. Filled of pretension.. Inside the church.. Many of us hide faces in walls of white…

If you somehow had hurt someone else. Be brave to ask someone forgiveness and acknowledge your fault. It will not make you weak. In fact, it will make you more peaceful and happier. If you can’t find the person. At least have a conversation with God to lead you and remind you your own feelings so He may cleanse your heart.

Those who knew me personally know that the real me loves people with sincerity..

I hope I may not hit some toes. Coz If I do.. Then my purpose has been fulfilled…
#selfpotrait

De flesta av oss vill att andra ska förlåta och fortsätta. Men vi glömmer mest vad vi sa som bröt deras hjärta.

När Gud förlåter oss, vill han att vi ska påminnas om vad vi talade och ta tillbaka de hårda orden vi har sagt. Gud talade då att vi skall bekänna till varandra (ett samtal mellan två människor som har någon misslyckad historia eller vissa omständigheter som kom upp som orsakade fördelning och skada ) och Gud lovade att efter att vi har begärt förlåtelse från människor som vi skadat eller åtminstone förlåter vi andra som skadar oss, då kan vi be till honom .. Och då förlåtar Gud oss. och även han kommer att ta bort all vår synd och kommer inte komma ihåg det längre ..

Men till oss människor .. Vi fortsätter att undvika att be om förlåtelse, för vi tror att Gud tar hand om det. Utan att veta att den personen som vi skadat omedvetet kämpar emotionellt, fysiskt och kanske andligt faller .. Är det inte lätt att stötta för dem och de snubblar? Och är det inte vi bär ansvaret för deras ont ..?

Om vi inte har någon möjlighet att hitta personen vi skadade men om vi kan hitta dessa personer och bara nå med en hand, kan vi ju prata med dem och samtala..
Det tar ett mod att be om förlåtelse, det tar tid med stolthet att riva ner den innan vi erkänner vårt eget fel.
Vi är faktiskt grymma!

Enligt min erfarenhet växte jag upp i en omgivning där jag vsrt upplärd att säga förlåt. I samhället växte jag upp med, jag har lärt mig att be om förlåtelse. Det tog mod innan jag lärde mig att göra det hemma. Fram tills idag har jag aldrig hört från de människor som kränkt mig, våldtagit mig, dömde mig och talade bakom mig.
Jag är stolt över att säga att jag bad om förlåtelse för att jag känner mig själv att det är syndigt att ha förbittring i mitt hjärta. Och jag vet för ett faktum att det ger mig frihet från att ha skulder till någon, även om jag tycker att jag har rätt. Det spelade ingen roll om jag tyckte att jag hade rätt. Det som betyder mest var att jag var modig att be om förlåtelse och säga förlåt och att jag menade det.
Det var det som gav mig fred … Ingen tvekan. Det är Guds Ande.

Inte undra på varför psykiska problem uppstår. Eftersom det finns många saker vi tar för givet.
Vissa människor väntar på tiden tills personen som skadade dem säger FÖRLÅT! Det tar till och med 10 år, 20 år eller 50 år innan de skulle höra det. Tyvärr är det så, innan de själva vågade säga förlåt!
Är det inte vi människor som vill att Gud ska förlåta .. Men vi föddes av motgång. Fylld av pretension .. Inuti kyrkan, bland troende.. Många av oss gömmer ansikten i den vita väggar …

Om du på något sätt hade skadat någon annan. Var modig för att fråga någon förlåtelse och erkänna ditt fel. Det kommer inte att göra dig svag. Det kommer faktiskt att göra dig mer fredlig och lyckligare. Om du inte hittar personen. Åtminstone ha en konversation med Gud för att leda dig och påminna dig dina egna känslor så att han kan rensa ditt hjärta.

De som kände mig personligen vet att den riktiga jag älskar människor med uppriktighet ..

Jag hoppas jag får inte slå några tår. För Om jag gjorde det.. Då har mitt syfte uppnåtts …

selfpotrait

What Matters the Most

I have thoughts about how others would respond when I do things that are inappropriate for them. I used to adjust myself on others opinions. Sometimes it works, sometimes it fails. But in the end, I have to pursue what I think is good even if I am uncomfortable with it. – Rochelle

There have been many issues is my life that I thought I couldn’t survive, some of the event had left a trace in my heart and bad thoughts in my memories. I can’t even imagine how I made it through or how I found the strength to put my feet back on track. There were times when I failed, people had judged me according to their measurements. It was easy for others to speak so much about how a person would get by life’s struggle but were not available to give a helping hand. It was easy to put themselves into the seat of a judge without balancing their judgement. It was corrupt. And it had left me flashes of pain.

I lived in an undesirable environment with people that has to tell me how to do things rathan teach me how to walk it. I lived with the thoughts “what they say matters in here”. But as life goes on, the four walls of my closed doors speaks the truth of who I am. It screams the need of change and the unstability reveals the weakness – a need of a true guidance.., -without self-deceit from others. The walls were the witness of myself, Incomplete, broken and easily swayed away. Was it because I thought I couldn’t do any thing at all? Or was it because I thought that they are the only right that I knew of? Either way, what they had said and what they told me… Did not Matter in the end-

I have noticed that nothing of these things matters because behind closed doors, I was alone when I cried and hit my heart many times because the pain consumed me. I was alone when I fought and God was my hiding place and strength to move on. It was not the religious affirmations that contributed to my well-being. Only the study of Torah!

Whatever they spoke and said, did not contribute a spot of strength but a huge of fear and incomplexity in me. Every step I took made me feel afraid of what others have to say, Every thing that I speak must adjust on what others feel. Not that I have to be disrespectful, but mostly I wanted to speak things as they are – without any hidden information. But that is also unacceptable to others.

Over the years, I struggled alone with the fight inside. I heard different opinions from each side and those words made me feel worried and worse. Thats when depression comes, you loose the interest and there is no sense of value in life. People would think I am strange because I sometimes have the feeling to wanting have friends but actually not wanting so much contact, wanting to meet people but not liking too much socializing. We are unaware sometimes that as we speak, our words can contribute either to build up or to destroy others – spiritually.. But as for me, I have learned to navigate myself through different circumstances. I have learned where to lay my eyes on and where to focus my ears and where to walk my feet. And it is amazing to find your strength not by physical upbeat but in your soul.

I tried to find self-esteem in fitness, in sports, in all kinds of creativity and practice to find peace. Instead of stillness, it gaved me the feeling that I need affirmation to know that I do my best. It was actually like using your hurt to get up – which will make you weary from the inside.

I found out that Peace cannot be achieved by self modification but with a motivation to forgive others without any hesitation no matter what or how they caused pain and damage to you. There is a willingness from the inside to create a harmony of stillness in the mind not needing any affirmation through physical activities. I do not say that Physical creativity is not useful – it is! The thing is that, it cannot contribute to peace if it is only a cover-up to build self-esteem. Most of the Mind problems cannot be solved from the outer core of our bodies – merely a full restoration from the inside. True peace is like, you will not need any affirmation from many people to talk around you on what and how to do. It is a built-in confidence you know? If you lost that, Maybe it is enough with few trustworthy friends to have a conversation regarding your weakness and strength. And from that point, it is up to you wether you will use your strength to invest in time forgiving others and a sense of acceptance on what had happened in your life. Just take time, You know things don’t change in a day. So One special thing to remember is, BE PATIENT! BE HOPEFUL AND HAVE FAITH! LEARN TO WAIT, And WORK UNDERPRESSURE!

The most interesting part for me is, I have been involved in many different beliefs and religious activities, yet none of them can fill the emptiness I had inside. So I stopped being religiously connected or I mean, I stopped being a church attendant (not that I forbid others to do so but if you want peace, you should know yourself first before interacting with so many people). I took my faith as a life. I lived it everyday. I joined people whom are studying the faith, searching for possibilities to change their course of life to become better and contribute to become a law-abiding citizen. It was actually different to read at home, meeting people with same faith, having a deep conversation about spirituality. Deep in the conversations and readings, I found that King Solomon has a lot of counsel towards people who have never yet found their understanding of life. A book to consider about growing in faith, wisdom and navigation to life pointing towards God.

I stopped listening to people whom are filled with envy and filled with so much talk about others. I stopped spending time with people who do not have any motivation of change at all. I stopped making friends with people whom are time consumers instead, I gained friends whom are filled with creativity, Faith involvement and Life changing stories. People whom are trying their best to become a better person each day. Making a good influence on others. One thing I did not stop is –— SMILING, being HAPPY and Adventourous in life..
After all! The Journey continues!

Hypocrites in the church

Hypocrites in the church

Just want to share a thought I have today. Thise who are married and are going through a hard time. Let your issues be resolved in your home and let God be your guide. Also.. If you allow people to advice you. Listen to those who have a been through circumstances that they had won victory together. Do not allow people whom were not even married make their own theory and creates worries in your mind. Some single people do not understand the secret of marriage. The communication, the adjustment, the roles of each and the responsibility towards one another. If a person that advice you that your partner is demonized and you better divorce, then you know what kind of lies they imply on you. Remember why you married in the first place. I speak fron experience and I spent my life in violent marriage and some unresponsible partners. Marriage is not always as blossom as it seems, it has its ways of updates and new learnings all the time.. But, There are exception to divorce. Violence and negligence.. Violence when your partner always abuse you, Negligence when your partner disregards you and ignore your needs and neglect your marriage to blossom. Other than that.. Its a role and responsibilities to perform. God provides at all times.